Sandwich Time

Say Anything just started.  Great movie. 
Been trying to compose a poem.  Got some lines, but that’s about it…
My anxiety has been high ever since I got to work, and even though I am home, it is still up there. 
I spoke to a friend back home a long time ago, and she gave me an update on one ex that I was totally glad that I broke up with.  He was a total loser… I just didn’t see it until later on in the relationship.  I was… 20 at the time, and he was… maybe a little bit older… I can’t remember now.  23, I guess. We went for far longer than was necessary, but at the time I didn’t know better.  I thought I could change things.  Well, you can’t.  I couldn’t.  He wasn’t going to change for me.  He was who he was.  I keep forgetting that about people.  You can’t change people.  No matter how much they say the love you, they are who they are.  Take a tip from me, if anyone actually reads this… Stop stressing about people.  I am currently working on that.  There is no point in bothering to try to tell anyone to change.  Just accept them.  Then, decide whether or not you want to remain in association with them.  It’s that simple. 
I make it complicated.  But yea… it’s that simple.
I am not getting any younger.  I don’t want to do things simply because time is running out… That is ridiculous.  I basically have 6 years left and then I am too old to bear children.  Wow, really?  I honestly forget how freaking old I am.  I am still unsure of whether or not I want children.  Then again, I believe in being married, with a decent income, of which I have neither.  That might explain why I am still unsure of the decision to have children…
Muuuust stop spending money.  I bought this collar, and it wasn’t cheap.  I caught myself looking online at stuff.  Nope.  I am saving up for a new tattoo.  I have plenty of stuff.  
So apparently my botched industrial on my right ear still lives.  I was fiddling with my hair in the mirror at work the other day, and noticed that the one side of the piercing had a black spot at the piercing opening.  Hm.  I picked at it, and it was ewwwww.  A bunch of crud was trapped in there.  So… if stuff was getting trapped, then… was the piercing still open?  It had been years… I had some 18g rings lying around, so when I got home that night, I tried… Yep!  Still open.  I used to have a 14g in there, but whatev.  I was just glad that it was still open!  I looked it up, and apparently it is called a helix.  Hm.  Ok then.  🙂  Better to have jewelry in there instead of grossness geting stuck in there.  I might see if a 14g would still fit… If it does, then that would be best…
Need a sandwich.  Time for a pb&j!!!

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