The Wall.

This week marks the third week that I am attempting to attend yoga at my studio for 4 times a week.  I cannot believe that I have made it through 2 weeks already.  I have also been trying really hard to watch what I eat, and so far it seems to be working out alright.  I try to eat right six days a week, and then one day a week I am allowed to eat what I want, within reason. 

Other things I have done: downsized all my Starbucks drinks to talls or shorts (unless it is an iced tea, which is calorie free so I do whatever size I want…), no snacking on pastries at work, and I am bringing a water cup to work with one sliced lemon in it and drinking lemon water at work all day.  So far, so good.  I haven’t really seen any changes in me, but I am sure that in a couple of more weeks I will see something.  It would be nice to see my weight drop.  Jeez.

I am also trying to get to bed earlier, even though I am quite the night owl.  But I am trying.  I seem to need alot of sleep… anywhere from 8 to 10 hours, usually hovering at 9.  As much as I would love to run on less sleep, I have to do what my body tells me to do.

July 7th will mark 5 years of working at Starbucks.  YIKES.  I am going to have to try harder at looking for a new job.  At the least, I might just transfer to a different Starbucks.  I am so bored… Even a different store will keep me distracted for awhile.  I hate applying for jobs.  I hate the silent wall of rejection.  5 years of silent rejection can get to you.  I am going to rediscover my love of reading and a few other things that I let tumble by the wayside and at least use those things to buffer me from the impenetrable wall of rejection.

And last but not least, money.  I spend what I truly don’t have… once in awhile it is ok, but I have finally buckled down and have steeled myself for the tempting trinkets and such that will come my way.  It is always easier for me at the this time of year… Christmas, my birthday this month… These events satisfy my shopping urge, but then once my birthday is gone, I have my anniversary in August and that’s it.  I finally came to the decision today that I cannot buy myself the bone cuff that I wanted so badly.  Every penny of my tax return needs to go towards paying off what I owe.  I can splurge a tiny bit, and I think that I will get some nice Trollbeads for myself.  We will see. 

I know that I will be happier once I control my spending.  I am not in serious debt, but I would like to not be in any debt.  So I can spend whatever I want, as long as I save for it or at least pay it off by the time the credit card bill is due.  I really don’t understand why I am not happy with what I have… I honestly have great stuff, and enough of it. 






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