Too Much

I think I have reached a minor breaking point.  Or maybe it is major, I am not quite fucking sure.  Today I felt the first pangs of uncertainty and it is frightening.

The house is on the market.  Two open houses and nothing.

I have broken up with Frank.  He is still residing in the house while I slip in and out like a stranger in my own home and hide out in my shabby apartment.

I have told my job that my last day will be January 3 and I am doing my damnedest to make it.  That’s 39 days.  I just need to put one foot in front of the other metaphorically speaking.

I do not know what lies ahead for me.  I have given up everything but it refuses to fucking let go. I am never going to be this committed to anything or anyone this much ever again.

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