(shrugs)

I don’t know what happened today.  Well, for starters, I got this idea in my head yesterday that I wanted to wake up and go away for the weekend.  Somewhere beautiful… by the ocean.  Then I took a look at hotel prices.  Nope. 

So, I woke up today around… 10-ish.  I guess I was pretty tired.  Kinda sucked though, because an earlier start might have pushed me to go somewhere.  Anyway. 

Went out for breakfast at Venita Rhea’s, and instead of getting what I knew I would like, I tried something else.  It was alright.  Then I ran around doing all sorts of stuff… It was windy, and I had chosen to wear a skirt.  Yep.  Saw an ad in a local free magazine whilst eating my breakfast about how a new place that just does waxing was giving away free eyebrow, underarm, or bikini waxes.  I decided to go and get my eyebrows done.  That was cool, because it was in a swanky new place, and it was FREE.  Got Marilyn Manson’s latest album.  The first two songs are good… I kinda phased out after that, because I was trying to make the most out of my day.  Went out to eat for dinner as well.  Tried something different.  Today was not my day on trying new things to eat lol.  I did get my beloved magazine however.  That was also worth it to me.  Also did some thrift store shopping and found a couple of really cute black and white tops.  And, we got to see our friend whom we haven’t seen in a long time… Strangely enough, he was in his car behind us and we had him follow us to where we were going just  so that we could share a cup of coffee and catch up before he had to be on his way. 

I dunno.  Finally started to head home, and I felt like… blank.  I have no idea why.  I got the magazine I wanted, I saw a friend unexpectedly, I got a free eyebrow wax… I dunno.  As soon as I came home, I hid upstairs and just flopped on the futon, wanting to be alone.  I feel a bit better now… mostly, I just feel tired. 

I hope that I can make sure that I stay in a better perspective tomorrow… I normally would be working, but one of the shifts switched with me, so I have it off.  Yus.

.

I hope that I don’t create pointless drama.  Or fuel it.

http://img.visualizeus.com/thumbs/09/01/03/quote,typography,life,quotes,text,frase-5df3a53bf4497e75b9fbd4be277c51bd_h.jpg

…

I am thinking about switching to wearing a cuff instead of a collar.  More in line with why I wear it… and yet more subtle at the same time.  Nice. 

Boy… today was a long day at work. 

I look at myself in the mirror and think… hm… Am I looking the best that I can be?  Am I looking the way I want to look?  Alot of times that when I smile for a picture or whatever, I look dumb.  I gotta remember not to smile so damn hard… Some people just have a beautiful smile.  Not me. 

What I like the least:  my eyebrows, my nose, my awkward bangs (lol!), my legs

What I like the most: my lips, my hair, my feet, my hands/wrists

 

 

Tired.

I am tired.  It is… 9:25, and I need to be at work, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 6am.  I am just glad that I am tired enough from closing tonight so hopefully I will hit the hay and fall right asleep. 

Sometimes working with certain people is frustrating. 

Why do I put myself in situations that aren’t appropriate?  I should just let things go… let them be what they are.

:p

I hate it when I have a really great thought that I want to share on here, but I can’t get it out right!

Fidget

Gah!

Ok that is a bit better. 

Aaand…

I love Lip Service.  I love them more when their stuff is on sale.  I need better clothes.  Time to dump more stuff!

 

.

It is interesting to note the different types of entries I put on the different social sites I belong to…

MySpace is just lighter stuff, here is more serious stuff, and Facebook I don’t blog.

Shit… Tribe I just couldn’t get rid of, so it is relegated to my jewelry!

Anyone else?

I will check back on this later…

Um.

Ok…. Yea so I am going to work on some things.  I have some ideas. 

*after I finish writing this, I am going to go grab the sewing machine and bring it downstairs.  And freaking make something.

*I really don’t like how loud I get, volume-wise… going to work on that

*If I am going out, I don’t need anything more than my driver’s license, and a few bucks.  I think that will help.

*More water.  Finis.

*Immediately delete anything in my e-mail accounts that talk about sales.

 

 

 

Blaaaaaa

So.  The other day at work, I was getting rung up by a fellow partner for something, and when I got my wallet out, she made a comment about how girly my wallet is.  It’s one of those long, checkbook-style wallets, and it is purple and kinda sparkly.  She said how I surprise her, that I don’t seem to be girly at all and then I have stuff like this wallet.  She is a very nice girl, and I know that the comment was not meant to be mean.  Still,  it gave me pause.  Not girly?  Me?  Really? 

http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Girly

OK maybe I am not that girly… But I would like to think that I am somewhat girly…  😦

 

Other things:

OK so I watched The Notebook.  Apparently, I need to be more secure, because it is what it is.  I get the message! 🙂   

YOU.  When are you done writing? We need to meet up at Edwin’s…

To my father:  OK… you have natural black hair and crystal blue eyes.  I was gypped, no thanks to you Dad!  I got the brown hair and the hazel eyes… Bor-ring.  I can dye my hair, but I still have blah color eyes.  Maybe some good ol’ black eyeliner would help…

I know it isn’t the norm to be friends with my bf’s ex, but whoever said I was normal?  I can’t help it if we get along! 

 

Seekers Of Lice by Rimbaud

The Seekers of Lice
by Arthur Rimbaud Translated by Jeremy Harding
When the boy's head, full of raw torment, Longs for hazy dreams to swarm in white, Two charming older sisters come to his bed With slender fingers and silvery nails. They sit him at a casement window, thrown Open on a mass of flowers basking in blue air, And run the fine, intimidating witchcraft Of their fingers through his dew-dank hair. He listens to their diffident, sing-song breath, Smelling of elongated honey off the rose, Broken now and then by a hiss: saliva sucked Back from the lip, or a longing to be kissed. He hears their dark eyelashes start in the sweet- Smelling silence and, through his grey listlessness, The crackle of small lice dying, beneath The imperious nails of their soft, electric fingers. The wine of Torpor wells up in him then — Near on trance, a harmonica-sigh — And in their slow caress he feels The endless ebb and flow of a desire to cry.