Sometimes, I feel like I am a mustang, running wild out on the plains, no particular direction; just running and running.

I reject a bridle.  I buck off a saddle.  I try to trample a foolhardy rider.

I just want sleep to come so that I can stop the mustang.  I need to stop running for just a little while.


The Ten Best Metal Songs To Play When At A Fast Food Drive-Thru Window

The Tyranny of Tradition

heavy metal drive-thru window

There are many hidden pleasures in being a metalhead.  That moment where you start talking to a stranger and realize he actually knows that Peter Steele was in Carnivore before he was in Type O Negative.  The moment where you are at the gym and you see a person on the workout machine next to you wearing a Carcass Heartwork tee-shirt.  That feeling you get when you are watching a bad, 1980s made-for-television movie about high school and notice one of the extras wearing a jacket with a giant Nuclear Assault patch on the back.  You’ll meet a ton of people throughout your life who think metal is nothing more than bad hairstyles, ripped up jeans and “Enter Sandman”, but that moment when you really feel the presence of another member of our bizarre little community is truly a compelling experience.

There is another type of joy that being a…

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Interesting Burial and Death Rituals

Gloomth & the Cult of Melancholy

We here at the ‘Cult have always been inspired by mourning rituals and attire of various cultures and eras. What’s fascinating about burial customs in particular is how they reflect the values and culture of the people they belong to, even as their lives evolve and change with time. Some traditions are dropped entirely and others are developed.

Korean Burial Beads– in South Korea available land for burial plots is dwindling so many families opt for cremation. Companies have sprouted up offering to turn the ashes into compressed beads. These beautiful beads are often displayed in the home in glass urns or elaborate dishes. Mourning and the way we honor those we have lost evolves to suit our culture and lives, this is a fascinating way to see that in action- how people develop new ways to maintain tradition and respect as their world changes.

south korea funeral beads Obviously not my photo. If…

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Keeping Promises

It takes work to undo the habits of being overly negative.  This is a statement that I am all too aware of.  I find myself actively pushing against the negative thought patterns that seep into my brain.  I need to shift my perception of what I consider negative and re-evaluate.  The bottom line is, I don’t like being coached at work.  I hate it.  Especially when it come from someone that I don’t know that well and am not sure of their managerial qualifications.  But it wasn’t coming from a bad place.  I have to remember that the intentions are good.

Though isn’t it said that the road to hell is paved with good intentions?

Distraction is good, it works for awhile, but I should try to remember what distraction is best for; calming down and rethinking my options.  Distraction is not meant to be a fix it all.  Eventually, one must return to the issue at hand that caused them to seek distraction elsewhere.  Otherwise, there is going to be quite a huge, monstrous issue waiting for you whenever you do decide to revisit it.

Today I will engage in mindful distraction.  I will utilize it in order to give my mind a rest from the stress that I have caused it.

For once I will keep a promise to myself.

Reviewing the Scary Movies That Traumatised My Childhood (Vol. 1)

Reviewing the Scary Movies That Traumatised My Childhood (Vol. 1).

I Just Don’t Want To Care

That’s the bottom line.  I don’t want to get upset, I don’t want to “work on it”.  I don’t want to go through the stress of “bringing it up in a meeting”.

I just don’t want to care if someone tells me I have done a shoddy job.

To be honest, I did the best I could.  I made a mistake.  Mistakes happen.  This was not a costly mistake, it was not a mistake to fire anyone over or give a verbal warning.

What bothers me is that I let it bother me.  I let the patronizing tone bother me.  I know what I did wrong, thank you for bringing it to my attention.  I will make sure not to do it again.  Please don’t talk to me like I am an idiot.

But the bottom line is… I let someone bother me.  THAT is what I need to work on.

Be cause then my life would be awesome.

Positive Memory Maker

Just got off of Skype with my boyfriend, and I realized that I find it terribly difficult to come up with positive memories of anything I have done since I moved to California back in February of 2006.  I seem to have a lot of positive memories from the East Coast…  So I am going to come up with some right now, and hopefully I will come up with some more in the near future.

1. spending 4th of July holidays with my friend Chrissy and her friends and family

2. my first year of working at Starbucks

3. getting my wings tattooed on my back with Ilana

4. all the indy coffee shops in Sacramento

5. my trip to L.A. when I met the Fishers

6. Ryan and I going to see Danzig with the Fishers in San Francisco

7. Exchanging Love bracelets with Frank

8. becoming the assistant manager for Alex and Ani in San Francisco

9. discovering Trollbeads and my jewelry partner in crime, Jess

10. the margherita pizza at Pizza Rock

11. watching White Christmas at the Crest theatre with Catherine and Frank

12. celebrating Jamie’s birthday in San Francisco

13. lambstravaganza with Frank, Becky, and Gilbert

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